Eels – Somerville Theater – 6/15/06

Worst…concert…ever.

Okay, that’s not fair. I definitely went to some concerts when I was in high school that were worse. Of course, those were bands composed of other people from my high school. The Eels, on the other hand, are on of my favorite bands of all-time. I’ve wanted to see them live for almost a decade (“Novocaine for the Soul” was my introduction to them in the Fall of 1996). Their first two albums (Beautiful Freak and Electro-Shock Blues) are among my favorite albums of all-time. So what happened?

Well, some backstory: I don’t go to many concerts. Part of this is because I live in Hanover, NH, and am busy traveling most of the time, so it’s not too convenient to make it to shows. But more than that, there are a couple things I really dislike about live shows, so I’m rarely motivated to go. ALL of those things (well, minus one) were in full effect tonight.

First, concerts are too loud. WAY too loud. Am I the only one that thinks this? I prefer to hear music, not be assaulted by it. Especially since the acoustics in most indie venues are mediocre at best, the feedback and whines are truly piercing at 100 decibles. The concert tonight was, by far, the loudest I have ever heard. Stunningly loud. I plugged my ears the whole time and it was still too loud. Back home, my dad’s house is directly under the flight path of the planes from the naval base. This concert was several magnitudes louder than an EA-6B flying 50 feet overhead. I honestly can’t understand how the people who listened to the show without protecting their ears didn’t suffer brain hemmorhages.

Second, most of the time, live stuff doesn’t sound as good as it does on the record. Some bands are clearly more focused on their performances, and put on a great show. But a lot of bands just attempt to re-create the sound of the original and it comes out at 80% quality. The re-creations tonight were okay, but nothing special, and most of the re-interpretations (with the one exception of the rocking version of “I Like Birds” to close the show) were inferior.

Third, there are very few bands who have all good songs. When I listen to music at home, I can skip over the stuff I don’t like. When I’m at a show, they insist on playing it. This was the main problem tonight. I like the Eels because so many of their songs have such a powerful emotional core. They are beautiful, light, touching. However, on their recent albums, there’s been a lot more of the noise-feedback-screeching songs and a whole album (Shootenanny) of garbage-generic-alt-pop-rock. I own both Souljacker and Shootenanny but haven’t listened to either (except for “Fresh Feeling”) in years. Until tonight, when I was reminded of a whole host of songs I had happily forgotten.

Fourth, stage presence is tough. Some bands are fun. They joke, tell stories, etc. That’s great. Some bands seem shy. They don’t say anything except “thanks” and look astonished that you paid money to watch them. That’s also great. But lots of bands unsuccesfully try to generate some kind of presenc. Tonight was the worst example of that I’ve ever seen.

The show began with about two minutes of unbearably loud feedback while a guy in a security shirt stood on the stage. Finally, the rest of the band came out, in full Unabomber gear. For the rest of the show, the three main band members had basically no involvement with the crowd at all. This was not a shy reserve, it was a deliberate refusal of acknowledgement. The big security dude, though, spent a number of songs air-boxing, made random comments in between songs, stood there looking menacing, etc. I can’t really think of any way to describe the atmosphere but to say it was incredibly masculine (Hunter would have been aghast). Given that I like the Eels because of the emotional core of their music, this was incredibly jarring, and gave the entire show a bitter taste.

Fifth, jam sessions. Once again, am I the only one who just gets bored? Yes, you can generate feedback. Congratulations. Welcome to 1965. Just because I like a song at 4 minutes doesn’t mean I want to hear minor variations on the same theme for 15 minutes. Tonight, I was treated to an approximately 13-minute tuning session version of “Not Ready Yet” which included a substantial section where Mark Oliver Everett left the stage, leaving his guitar in the care of the air-boxing guy. What he needed to do offstage for 5 minutes in the middle of the show, who knows?

Sixth, the smoke. Just gross. Thankfully, Massachusetts bans smoking indoors so at least I was saved from that tonight.

All that said, many of the other people in the crowd seemed to be enjoying themselves perfectly well, so who knows? I just know that I love the Eels, but not only would I not pay 20 dollars to see them again, you’d probably have to pay me the 20 bucks to sit through another show. If the show hadn’t been in a theater (meaning I was in a seat in the middle of a row), I would have left halfway through.

Anyways, I was planning on doing a big thing on the Eels, talking about some of my favorite songs by them, and posting a bunch of rare stuff, a big extravaganza. But frankly I’m way too fed up with them to face it. Maybe in a week when the bad taste from the show is gone…

For now, sorry about the rant, and I’ll return to posting about enjoyable musical experiences tomorrow.

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